literature

Is it love...

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mxlove's avatar
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Published:
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Literature Text

My mind wanders off,
galloping in the fields of your world.

Gazing at your eyes,
blue as the sky,
makes my heart beat extra fast.

Your hair,
golden as the sun;
your scent,
so sweet and new,
has me dreaming,
every step towards your embrace.

Your arms,
so strong,
leading me in a romantic dance;
your voice,
so enchanting,
whispering my name.

So many words I'd want to say to you,
so many great things,
I'd like to share,
but whenever our eyes meet,
I lose control.

I lose control of my senses,
and nothing but a sigh,
slips out of my lips.

Your body and mine make one.

Your breath tickling my ear,
as if your soul were to murmur secrets I'm yearning to hear.

My heart is pumping.

My head resting on your shoulder,
you place your arms,
protectively around me,
I feel so safe,
it feels so great.

You know, it's this feeling I can't explain, and,
Only you can bring me the kind of happiness I can't express.

These days I'm going through this emotional stuff about this guy I really like, but I'm not sure if I love him.
This is not exactly me but my story helps me write all this stuff I usually can't write...
Please comment and fave if you like it =p
critique is appreciated =)

Also inspired by today's #deviant365's task!
© 2010 - 2024 mxlove
Comments5
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ChibiMoonX's avatar
:star::star::star::star: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star: Vision
:star::star::star-half::star-empty::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Impact

Great poem. Originality is pretty low because, well, how many poems out there are about love? A lot. - 1/2 star on impact because of how generic it is.
but other than that, it's great. Imagery is very nice. especially here:
'Gazing at your eyes,
blue as the sky, '

One line that blew me away was this :
'Your breath tickling my ear,
as if your soul were to murmur secrets I'm yearning to hear.'
simply amazing. Very Very Very powerful!

Another thing that I like about this poem is how the length of the stanza's vary so much. It contains no structure whatsoever. And it's nice.

Great job, just a bit generic.

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